Hello. I’m a big fan.
I’m a fan of Energy. Way before this present revolution of quantum physics and the Green Movement. More than anything else – your intelligence, religious or political leanings, sexual orientation, clothes you wear…you know – things you see on the surface, I first zero in on your Energy levels. It’s not something I do consciously. It’s always been automatic. Since I was a child, I’ve noticed that I didn’t hear so much as feel people when they spoke, no matter how clear and eloquent their words were. I had a sense of them first. Then according to what I felt, my ears would choose to open or stay shut. 🙂 I wonder if you’re the same way…
I’ve learned that Energy is not just one’s physical strength or mental power. It’s stability, sturdiness of body, mind and spirit. It’s the complete package. Ganda mo nga, dami mong bling, pero wala ka namang Inner Glow, talo! I know. I’ve been this way many times.
Which is why I believe that Energy conveys more as a feeling-it than a seeing-it.
Ok, now that I’ve expressed what Energy means to me, let me tell you this: I have never felt more energetic as wife, mom, artist and entrepreneur than in my present life! We’ve always known there was no single magic pill, positivity mantras, pilates routine or protein powder out there that can do it for us. There IS though, a winning combination of all of the above.
And then there was You.
My Energy story begins at the end. Let me explain. Tayong mga 20th century kids, we were made to believe that it starts at the physical level. The billboards and magazines and TV and Oprah told me that if my body was in great shape, if I did the right workouts, if I ate the right foods, then did the right career moves, then I’d have great levels of energy, too, right?
I tried, albeit short-lived, the “magic pill”. You know them: those expensive capsules, as some skinny BFFs swore by, helped “maintain your ideal weight”. Not only did it not help make anything ideal for me, it turned my insides into a poisonous pit. I had to expel everything, short of sacrificing my stomach lining.
Finally, I tried with my mind. I read, repeated, regurgitated all the positive mantras and affirmations I could get my synapses on. That was good. For a while. I found that it made for information overload and brought me to a state of analysis-paralysis. “So why do I think/act this way? What’s the source of my sadness and insecurities again? And what’s the mantra for that?!” Bah, kapuya! LOL.
Why just survive when you can thrive, She asked?
In the end there was the simple, old-fashioned, back-to-basic thing: good old Prayer. But of course it begins, MUST begin with prayer! All my previous attempts at wellness were human-styled. May I add that in all my various attempts, I kept journaling and making art. Those were my constants. I guess that was a form of prayer, too, noh? Those helped me survive, true. But why survive when we can thrive?
So I sat. I got to practicing my prayer-of-choice – the Holy Rosary, creating a connection with Mother Mary/The Goddess who I always felt a strong affinity with; and Meditation. This reinforced the swimming, the singing, the sewing, the splotching of paint, snapping of photos, sharing my ZealForLife story and most especially the seeing that everything must begin with Sitting. Quiet.
In a nutshell, my story rebooted with a zealous, honest-to-goodness, humble-pie prayer. For help. It always goes like this: Help me. Help me. God help me. Short and sweet and super powerful.
This is my most valuable lesson of late: Energy is precious commodity. If I don’t have it, everything shuts-off. I can fake it but I won’t make it. Not for the long-haul anyway. So I take care of it now, the same way one takes care of a baby. It’s that valuable. I see it clearly now. So I share it courageously here.
To courageous in Creativity and the Energetic YOU,